Does Killing Someone Ever Cross Your Mind ?

This type of fag is the one that everyone hates.

Today I was driving on my way to the mall, and some asshole’s car broke down in one of the lanes. So there is only one other lane with no one around so I put the nose of my Jeep into that lane. While I’m waiting a young kid with a Nissan pulls up into the lane that my nose is in and tries to cut in between the nose of my car and the guardrail. Well I drove right in as soon as traffic began to move coming inches from driving over the front end of his shit ass car. So he began to hold down his horn like the little bitch he is. First off the fact that he even had that nerve is unbelievable. Don’t fuck with someone then honk like its the other guys fault.

Lee will kill your whole family with his car.

As soon as we began moving this bitch kid gunned it in front of me at the lights almost taking off my front bumper. So I was just about to hop the curb and block in his car however my wife began screaming NONONO! Always have to have someone telling you not to do something that you really should do. Anyway so light turns green and I begin following him into the mall parking lot. He then slows almost to a stop.. so I slow down to get out but he kept moving so I figured, no problem gun it into on coming traffic and go around him almost driving right over his fuck car like a speed bump. We turn the corner and he guns it past me again ..haha.. so anyway I follow him and I stop in front of the mall to let out my wife, he parks but what he doesn’t notice is I see him and I see where he now has parked.

Equal rights. He'll punch the shit out of your girlfriend too!

Now this is where killing a mother fucker actually crossed my mind. I see him and his girl friend get out of there car and begin walking into the mall. He doesn’t see me, but I see him, and I’m seriously thinking.. I’m gonna run this mother fucker over.. Then I thought, nahh.. instead I’m going to go to his car and push it with my jeep into the middle of the fuckin parking lot. Well.. eventually I just threw an entire large cup of coffee all over the windshield and hood of his car.

This kid is very lucky because I really thought about killing this person. Like not just beating him actually killing him and his girlfriend.. like no longer breathing shit.. both dead chalk outlined and all. I really don’t know what to say at this point about stupid people and the thought process that goes through there fucking mind. Do you know who you are fucking with? I don’t think you do!

I take medication to calm me down mother fucker .. don’t catch me on a day when I forgot to take it. Anyway, hope people get to understand if you were in the fuckin wrong just admit it and everything is fine. But you wanna be a douche? Go ahead and just hope someone aint behind the wheel that will kill a mother fucker.

I’m LeeRoy and your lucky to be alive today.

Chris Angel is God

Do it!!! You can come back to life right?

I was watching Chris Angel the other day and after he levitated and walked up the side of a building I came to the realization that Chris Angel is God. If not God then he is Jesus reborn, I mean Jesus turned water into wine. But Chris Angel walks on water. He can cut off parts of his body and put them back on. He can disappear then reappear like a fuckin ghost or some shit.

That brings me to the name, Chris ANGEL …hmmm… last name is ANGEL.. sounds like its right in our face for all to see but we are all blind like Ray Fuckin Charles. Chris Angel is an actual Angel and he can do all those things that Jesus can do but better. I know your saying what about David Blaine?  FUCK DAVID BLAINE ! So now back to Chris Angel and Jesus Christ.

Chris Angel is amazing this guy first off is Greek .. and you know back in the day Greeks were people from Athens and Athens had warriors and big places to fight and watch soccer matches.  Greeks were the first people on the earth and they invented Slovakia and Gyro’s. God and Jesus never invented that Greeks did. And while I’m getting on that the Greeks had sex with sheep’s. Jesus didn’t have sex with gods creatures at all actually he supposedly never had sex with anyone. How can you be the son of God and not have sex with anything. If I was the son of God id be telling everyone that I was the son of God and id be smashing everything because everything is spectacular and nothing is fucking boring.

So Chris Angel is Greek and he can levitate bring himself back from the dead and get run over by a fuckin Hummer. Ask yourself can God get run over by a fuckin Hummer?  I think not .. and Chris Angel supposedly smells great ! Like cookies or some shit .. Jesus never smelled great .. he didn’t even smell bad .. he smelled like goat shit because he was a goat Herder and rode Chris Angels coat tails. He tried to be like Chris angel turning water into wine but Chris was like .. ha ha .. fuck water into wine .. I’m gonna turn nothing into something .. and he turned nothing into a great goat orgy from nothing .. FROM NOTHING.  He just snapped his fingers and boom goats out of the blue .. in orgy positions for every one to have when they want. I think that was pretty spectacular, he was an entrepreneur and gave sandals to the poor. That’s how Sandals Vacations became wealthy. Because it has the name Sandals in it.

So Chris Angel can disappear into the sand and walk on water and all that shit .. that’s crazy .. there should be a church called Angels of Chris church for me to go to and eat ice cream wich by the way was invented by Greeks and Greek the word actually means Angel in English. Besides you know Greeks invented Greece .. and Greece is really oil .. and oil makes the world go round, and that’s why Chris Angel is a God .. or he is God .. or more powerful like Voltron in space who looks over God .. and tell God .. look God .. I’m Voltron / Chris Angel I want you to get me a coffee and God is like no problem sir right away.

Do you think that Chris Angel vs Chuck Norris? Chuck Norris is like Jesus ..but just old and shit.. but serious .. Chris Angel would kick his stupid ass hole. I think Chris Angel would just turn Chuck Norris into a nute .. and then eat him because nutes are delicious. then he would burp and a earthquake would follow with death and disease. I know I know your saying David Blain .. FUCK DAVID BLAIN… if Chris Angel were to face off against David Blain .. Chris Angel wouldn’t even show up .. he would send Chuck Norris and Chuck Norris would fuck David Blain like a rabid fat goat in heat. By the way Greeks also invented heat.. have you ever been to Greece? Its hot there and that’s why Chris Angel created Star Trek because Star Trek and Tupac are HOT !  Paris Hilton didn’t even invent that word Hot .. Chris Angel did but because Paris Hilton is one of Chris Angels bitches .. because Chris Angel is a pimp .. hes Greek and has a giant heard of roaming goats and sheep remember. Anyway he invented Hot .. and Greek spelt backwards is Keerg and Keerg is like Keg wich is full of delicious beer and Chris Angel Invented it.

Look Chris Angel is higher then god or anyone like that .. and he does what he wants and that’s why he has a TV show and you dontso you cant even claim that im wrong. shhhhhhhh  just zip ..zip it.

I’m LeeRoy and Chris Angel is the Voltron of the universe and God is his bitch.

You know who I think I look like..

No one is going to be licking your fingers..

I remember working at this new company a few years back and meeting one of my co-workers for the first time, I introduced myself, and when he did a return introduction, he said, “you can call me JT”.  Definitely different from his real initials of, well, we’ll say SG.

Of course I am curious, some people of different backgrounds use more westernized names and nicknames sometimes (he was white though), or perhaps you go by your middle name(s), or what ever.  This wasn’t the case. He said “Well I look like Justin Timberlake, so you can just call me JT”.  He looked like Justin Timberlake just as I look like Dr, Manhattan in The Watchmen.

OMG...Cher? WTF? Try Bram Strokers Dracula..

Sometimes it’s OK to think in your head that you look like a celebrity, but when you need to start trying to convince people that you look like, are related to, or are that celebrity, it’s going a little far.

Funny enough I see this happen more with guys.  I have met people that have had a habit of telling other people who they look like, and it’s almost always guys.  We go to a bar, they walk up to a girl, and tell them straight out that they look like Jude Law, or Brad Pitt.  The icing on the cake is cutting your hair like that person and trying to dress like that person.  How many Brad Pitt movies must you rent before you think you pulled it off?

I don’t want to know who you think you look like because that’s a really sad existence. Celebrity impersonation is for drag queens..

Your secret wishes come through while driving..

You know that asshole in the fancy car that his parents bought him.  The expensive car that he never had to lift a finger to get, never had to pay insurance on, and will never have to pay maintenance because Daddy will pay for all that.

You know that feeling you get when he rides your ass, cuts around you, and drives like a jackass.  You have that one wish…

Here it is…

The gayest workout ever

Doesn’t get gayer than this.  I always knew there was something up with those gym metrosexuals..

Hulkamanic Depressive

Hulk Hogan – Hulk Hogan Floored By Marriage – [Contactmusic News]

Hulk Hogan thought about killing himself, even going as far as holding a loaded gun, when his marriage ended.

The legendary wrestler – real name Terry Bollea – got as far as picking up a gun to shoot himself when wife Linda Bollea filed for divorce after nearly 24 years together, following claims he had had an affair in 2007.

In his autobiography, ‘My Life Outside the Ring’, Hulk wrote: “There were times when I thought that a whole bottle of pills would go down easy.

“Then I noticed the gun in my hand. I was careless with it… I kept my finger pressed right to that trigger… and if I moved that finger an inch in the right direction I would have blown my brains out.”

Hulk’s depression descended further when his son Nick was indicted on reckless driving charges. He had been involved in an accident which left his friend and passenger, John Graziano, with a broken skull and in need of lifelong medical care.

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Wow. Hulk's looking pretty old..

(se: Shiiiit.. I don’t think it was the divorce itself that messed up Hulk Hogan, I think it was the fact that his wife was a stupid bitch and she’s milking him for every penny she can get.  Especially the cars.  I think I covered this before and said that he should just OJ her.  It’s bad enough that she is taking his money, which isn’t hers, that she didn’t earn, and she is taking his house, but the cars?  You evil bitch!  I guess also having a douchebag son that’s a loser wannabe fast and furious racer, and a daughter that looks like a guy that can’t sing, but keeps trying (sure, I guess you get bonus points for trying..), man..it’s like a horrific suicide just waiting to happen.  Hulk should have just killed his entire family when he had the chance..)

Jon and Nadya Plus 14 plus another 8 on Weekends

Octomom Is Hot For Jon Gosselin – [myfoxphilly.com]

PHILADELPHIA – Octomom Nadya Suleman says Jon Gosselin is hot and she has a crush on the reality TV dad.

Suleman spoke with Radar Online about the 32-year-old former “Jon & Kate” star, and she also had some life advice for Kate Gosselin.

“I wish everyone would leave her alone. I’m sure she trusts herself and trusts that she’s strong enough to handle it.”

But her best comments were about Jon Gosselin.

“I kind of have a crush on Jon Gosselin,” Suleman said. “I think he’s hot!”

Suleman has 14 children, including her octuplets. Jon Gosselin has eight children, including his sextuplets.

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Make babies and profit!

(se: I would definitely tune in to watch “Jon and Nadya plus 22“. It’s like one of those crazy Mormon families, except for Nadya being bat shit crazy, and Jon being an attention whore. Imagine the crazy antics that you’ll get to see.  Also picture the look on Kate’s face when Jon goes to pick up his kids for a custody visit in a school bus.

In reality we’re all waiting for Jon, Kate, and Nadya to have their kids taken away and them all locked up in some mental ward for being retarded unfit parents.  Using your kids as a gateway to fuel your own fantasies of being a celebrity are weak. I’m looking at you too Billy Ray Cyrus..)

People on bikes piss off everyone, everywhere.

How do we get bikers to obey traffic laws? – [Slate Magazine]

Heading home from work yesterday, I ran five red lights and three stop signs, went the wrong way down a one-way street, and took a left across two lanes of oncoming traffic. My excuse: I was on a bike.

I’m far from the only menace on two wheels. A colleague was recently slapped with a moving violation after breezing through a stop sign. My roommate was pulled over 30 feet from our house for the same infraction. And driving around Washington, D.C., recently, I saw a cop scribbling out a ticket to a bewildered biker.

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(se: So it’s true.  Everyone everywhere hates people on bikes.  Basically you know what it is, 99% of people on bicycles believe that they own the road and don’t have to follow the rules of the road.  They get a bike, ride all over the road, don’t signal, don’t follow the rules, and expect everyone to live with it, and go out of their way for them.  A few nights ago I almost ran over two bikers dressed in black, on black bikes, with no lights or reflectors, as they just zig zagged back and forth across the road in a poorly lit area.  You know what would have happened if I hit them right? Some faggy bicycle organization would be calling for my head.

That's what you get for riding like a douche. Fucking hippy..

When I was younger, I was driving around downtown one day, and this biker flew over my hood.  She got up, picked up her bike and started yelling at me while my friend laughed his head off.  She was trying to tell me that I should be looking out for bikers and that she had the right away. This despite her hitting my car and flying over the hood, not me running into her.  She actually rode into the side of my car. The motto of the story? You can’t ride your bike across traffic when cars have the right away and expect everyone is going to stop for you.  You should be following the lights just as cars do.

I would love for Toronto to create a law that says that bike owners need to have their bikes plated and insured, and that they need to pass a bike safety course to get a bicycle license. Make sure they have to legally wear a helmet, have a bell or horn, reflectors and a light on their bike, and HAVE to obey the traffic code just like cars or face nice fat fines.  This would be a perfect way to get these fuckers respecting the road, and keeping people out of danger.  I am still waiting to strangle my first biker, and at this rate it might be soon.)

Balloon Boy a hoax. We all knew it and were waiting for this!

DiManno: Balloon boy bursts dad’s bubble [thestar.com]

Famous. Infamous. The distinction doesn’t matter any more. The Heenes got what they lusted for: Worldwide TV face-time, a pathetic affirmation of their otherwise insignificant existence, star billing in manufactured melodrama. Mission accomplished. All it took was an aluminum foil balloon that resembled a humongous hangover ice-bag, a conspiracy of pretense forced on their children and the complicity of a credulous media contaminated by infotainment pressures. And cops too, they were in on the sham, albeit and allegedly somewhat belatedly, mounting what they now claim was a tit-for-tat sting in order to elicit the truth.

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Hope you get a good raping in jail fuck face!

(se: Ok.  Everyone with a half a brain knew this was a hoax.  When normal people get their dose of Reality TV stardom they could never get back to their normal dull lives.  Now this was a stupid hoax anyways, and these people are definitely nut cases.  The best part is that your son screwed it up for you.  It’s probably God’s way of punishing you for naming him Falcon.  Only hippies and Native Indians name their kids after animals.  You know what I would like to see?  I’d like to see the family have to pay back every cent that was spent by the authorities on this, and jail time for the parents.  Like 10 years jail time.  That will teach them  a valuable lesson! Bastards)

The best job ever!

The best job ever?

Fuck university! Yes fuck it!

Are you in highschool right now?

Well you’re in luck! Drop out while you’re ahead, and laugh at all those suckers that want to finish highschool and to university to become an IT specialist, or ugh.. a doctor or something.

We should all be making a million dollars a year...no wait 2 million dollars a year!

With your grade 9 education you are on the verge of gaining a job where you’ll never get fired, you don’t need any skills, and you’ll get paid more than a doctor. Only bad part is that you’ll have to go on strike every year or two to demand even more money, or even better benefits then the god like ones you already have.

Can you guess the job?

I’m sure you guessed right. Any job where you are an Auto Union Worker.

Take your pick, Ford, Chrysler, GM, they are all waiting for you, and once you’re in, you’ll be there for life, why leave? The Union will take care of you, and make sure you milk every cent from your employer, while knowing that no matter how shoddy your work is, you can never be fired.

Am I serious? Yes.

Why not make up to $80/hr doing a $20/hr job? The only downside is that milking the company out of all its money, eventually will cause them to go bankrupt again, but then again the government will bail you out again, so it’ll be safe.

Remember, if you can’t get overpaid, it’s not worth working.