The most awesome Tiger Woods Re-enactment

Gotta hand it to the Chinese.  They make life super awesome.  I love how Tiger gets beat up and chased with the golf club.  CNN learns to learn from these guys..

Redneck Conspiracy

Big Foot fact or fiction?

Ever been walking in the wood’s and see something lurking? Something that doesn’t look like it should be there, or at least looks like a someone running with a fur coat on through the woods?  No?  Me neither.

That begs the question, is Big Foot fact or fiction?  I think Big Feet are real. I mean have you seen Shaquille Oneal’s feet? That’s a huge bitch! But really, could Big foot be real? Sure he could, so could the tin man, the scare crow and the cowardly lion.

Big Foot, or a naked Greek guy?

Sure Big Foot is cool but is he really cool? What if he was real and you were walking in the forest minding your own business when *splat* you’re hit with a giant ball of Big Foot shit? Is that cool? No dammit! That’s horrible. It’s worst than horrible, it’s terrible. Well it’s disgusting, and that’s why Big Feet are real. Because it’s horrible to walk in the woods and be hit in the face with a ball of Big Foot shit, and this world is horrible, so it must be true. Besides the only people that have actually seen Big Foot are the ones that fuck their cousins and live in the trailer park wild.

Now let’s think, if Big Foot was real what would he be like? I think he would be like a bear that looks like a human but dresses like a bear and sleeps like a bear, but sounds like a dog with vampire fangs and a giant wand like dick that he screws sloths and other weird looking animals with. Yeah magical Big Foot wand cock, and he terrorizes squirrels and sheep or something like that. He owns a cave with a view and throws balls of his own shit to defend himself wrapped in leaves. I think he sucks his own dick and balls and probably can fuck himself and make baby’s with himself. So he is really a transvestite hooker of the woods with a magical Big Foot dick full of green leaf juice and he sprays the grass and shit and leaves to make them green.

What if Big Foot was really Mother Nature? And Mother Nature was a stupid whore that fucked the woods in the ass? So many what ifs that I’m starting to shake. My brain cant fathom any more what ifs. I say that Big Foot is bull shit! And so are gnomes. So in conclusion, after a long and lengthy scientific research of the possibility of Big Feet. My conclusion is that there is no such thing as Big Foot!

End of Story..

My name is LeeRoy ………….and there is no such thing as Big Foot

Hand Sanitizer bottles WTF ?

So I have two hand sanitizer bottles on my desk. Both have gotten low, and I came to realize that even though they still have about a cm left in the bottom, you cant get any of it out.

I looked at the bottom of these bottles and realized that they have indents so where the straw thingy sits all the actual sanitizer sits around the outside. Why the fuck would they make these like this?  I was thinking that the government covered this up because by inverting the bottoms of these sanitizer bottles they make you buy them earlier. You have to keep buying them and then you get the bird/swine flu, and ebola, all because the government wants to take away your drivers license for running down pedestrians that are illegally taking there sweet ass fucking time jay walking across Chingacousy Rd.

Anyway, it’s a cover up. Check out the bottom of your sanitizer bottles you will see what I mean. That’s all i’m saying ..

My name is LeeRoy… and its a fuckin’ cover-up !

Superbowl 42: 3/2, the new 9/11

Didn’t see this one coming did you?

After the Patriots lost, which was unexpected by the majority, it seems that conspiracy theories have been hitting the web.

I have heard a few about the time keeping in the game, and how the win was pushed towards the Giants.

Was there that much money involved?

Was there somethng that all of us missed?

Did the NFL try to make sure the Miami Doplhins retained their record?

Did you see that old lady at the end with her skeleton grip on the Vince Lombardi Super Bowl Trophy?

The best thing about the Super Bowl anyhow, is the fact that everyone will watch it, make bets, and talk about it for the next week as if a good 60% of those people watched football anyhow.

In Canada it’s about the Grey Cup, and I don’t think anyone really cares…

Now that the Super Bowl is over, we can get ack to finding Osama bin Laden and perhaps blame him for 3/2, the new 9/11.

Here is a video talking about how the Patriots would have won if the game time was managed correctly, with bad video and audio..

Does it make sense to you?

Even smoking in your car will cost you… That might be a $100 option sir…

With smokers not being able to smoke pretty much anywhere now-a-days, car companies are now excluding ashtrays in cars, and charging up to $100 for the “smokers group” option.

Time to upgrade to the patch folks.

All models of Chrysler and Dodge minivans have included extra storage space instead of ashtrays since 1996. Many other manufacturers, such as Cadillac, Saturn, Infiniti and Honda, are leaning more and more toward smokeless vehicles.

“I’m not surprised,” said Marysville resident Chip Cieslinski, as he stretched out in a $61,000 Lexus LS460, which did feature a “hideaway” ashtray.

“In fact, I’m pleased about it. It says a lot about how people view smoking today. I’m 48, and when I was growing up, every car had an ashtray. Today I drive a Pontiac Grand Prix and it doesn’t have an ashtray.”

However, the manufacturers of top-end vehicles such as Lexus, Mercedes-Benz and Rolls Royce still design their vehicles with lighter and ashtrays as standard equipment.

The trend towards smoke-free cars frustrates smoker J.P. Langworthy of Kalamazoo.

“It’s not right; people expect them in their cars,” said Langworthy, 24, sitting in the front seat of a Mercedes-Benz.

“Do you know what smokers have to go through today just to smoke? It’s like they’re trying to erase us from history.

“Even nonsmokers can use ashtrays to hide things or to store spare change.”

Langworthy opened a small compartment on the console and broke into a grin.

“All right, it’s an ashtray and lighter.

“Wait a minute; that’s a power outlet and there’s a ‘no smoking’ symbol stamped on the bottom of the tray. It’s a storage area! I should have known better.”

[Read More]

Finding Osama Bin Laden made easy: The Thug Life Conspiracy

It’s been like, what 12 years since 2pac died?

But you’ve probably noticed every year a new 2pac CD comes out. It’s been happening for the last 12 years, so I’m definitely sure you had a few questions about that.

I think 2pac probably has more CD’s out than most other living musicians. Go figure.

Conspiracy? Perhaps?

2001, we witnessed 9/11 and the US Government went looking for Osama in Afghanistan, while also deciding to go screw up Iraq as an ego trip. At the same time 2pac kept popping out CD’s, and we haven’t been able to find him either.

Every year or so, Osama also releases a CD or audio tape, so perhaps there could be a connection we’ve missed and perhaps there could be a Death Row Records recording studio somewhere in the mountains of Afghanistan.

We won’t know till we ask Suge Knight.

But something is definitely up…..